We are told when we have irregular periods, pain, or pretty much anything that doctors should really flag as potential endometriosis but don’t. ‘Here, take the pill.’ ‘You need to get on contraception.’ Or worse, especially if you have been diagnosed with endometriosis, the doctors in their wisdom will say ‘have a baby’ like it is some cure all. If you have endometriosis and have ever been handed contraception as your only option, then it is important to know that for me, contraception made my endometriosis worse.

One doctor told me to have a child when I was single and 20, like it was just a pill, not an entirely new problem. I responded, ‘Jump on then, your child support would be great.’ That shut the educated idiot up!

Is Contraception Really a Cure for Endometriosis?

Turns out, contraception is not the cure. We know that endometriosis is impacted by hormones. But hysterectomies don’t always cure it. Babies don’t always cure it. Men can even have endometriosis. So if it isn’t entirely hormonal, hormonal treatment is obviously not always the way.

I don’t pretend to know everything there is about endometriosis. But what I do know is that neither do doctors.

How frustrated many endometriosis warriors feel with our invisible illness.

Pushed Pills for Symptomatic Relief

As it stands, the hormonal endometriosis treatment most commonly offered is contraception, which is ridiculous because ironically, since I have been off all forms of contraception for a year now, I have never been better. Obviously this could be due to a myriad of other things. But I don’t think it unlikely that contraception made my endometriosis worse — and research backs this up. In fact, women who used hormonal contraception early in life were found to have a 3.6 times higher probability of being diagnosed with endometriosis later on.

I was put on the pill at 15 after moving to China and having very unusual periods and horrible pains, likely due to the stress and change of living in a different country. Then I just never got off it. I would hop from one treatment to the next. Various pills made me super emotionally unstable, but I just thought I had depression and anxiety, which of course I did, but this was significantly hormone related.

The Implanon made me bleed for the whole year, and the doctors refused to remove it until ‘I had just tried it a bit longer.’ I almost ended up like Katniss Everdeen with her tracker cut out by the end of it. Then I moved to the Mirena, which to be fair was the best solution I had experienced. Life was significantly better with it. But never have I been as good as I am now, since I have actually just let my body be.

Even the Mirena Wasn’t the Full Answer

The Mirena was a step up from the pill — I want to be clear about that. The mood crashes, the constant bleeding, the emotional chaos of those early years on various pills was significantly worse. But the Mirena was not without its own issues.

With just the Mirena in, I felt better. So much better than before. But I still had insane PMDD for a full week, sometimes even 10 days leading up to my period. Ovulation was also painful and uncomfortable.

Out of the whole month I realistically had about seven days of actually feeling good. It was not much of a life.

What I now know is that a hormonal IUD like the Mirena still suppresses your natural cycle, and for women with PMDD this can make things significantly worse — because eliminating your period doesn’t eliminate the hormonal fluctuations driving PMDD in the first place.

Contraception Made My Endometriosis Worse

Over and over I had tried various contraception’s, and over and over I had incredible pain. Ruptured cysts, ovarian torsions. I bled so much once that I passed out. I had chest pains that put me on my knees in the middle of the street like I had been shot. Fainting constantly. Fatigue so bad I would sleep up to sixteen hours a day, needing to constantly nap just to survive. Not being able to eat for the pain of it. Throwing up like I was constantly in my first trimester, being accused of bulimia when it was all just hormonal intolerance.

And the moods. The moods were unbearable. Wanting to die, whilst simultaneously knowing I had a good life with love and kindness. Part of this was that my body was failing me so much that I was just beside myself. But the other part was hormonal. The hormones told me I was depressed, the same way they make a new mother hurt.

Many women with endometriosis symptoms are handed contraception as a management tool without being told it can amplify things for some. Studies show hormonal contraception is ineffective for many endo patients and linked to worsening chronic pelvic pain.

If contraception made your endometriosis worse too, you are not imagining it.

Photo taken during an endometriosis attack whilst on the pill and Mirena.

Coming Off Contraception Was the Best Thing I Ever Did

I have tried it all. Chiropractors, Chinese medicine, acupuncture, hypnotherapy, sound healing, restrictive diets, physio, womb massages (which was actually fantastic, if you want to read more about it here), and breathwork. I do fully believe that these things can significantly help. Especially the breathwork for me. That really shifted things. If you want to know more about it, read this article I wrote on it.

But what has made the biggest impact? Coming off contraception.

I am a new person.

It has been one year now and I was so scared. I had spent my entire womanly life on contraception, being told that if I came off, I would get worse. Only the complete opposite was true. I feared the heavy bleeding, the unstable moods, the endometrium regrowth.

And in one year? Nothing. I’ve had a few pains, but it’s practically non-existent in comparison. It’s more like how sometimes people get headaches. Sometimes I get endometriosis pains.

Here is an honest before and after of my endometriosis symptoms on contraception versus off it:

Symptom	On Contraception	One Year Off
PMDD after Mirena / pill	Up to 10 days of rage and despair and miserable for most of the month.	One hellish day per month
Pain levels	Ruptures, fainting, chest pains, bed-bound	Occasional mild cramps or short lived stabbing pains
Fatigue	Sleeping up to 16 hours a day	Normal, sustainable energy
Mood	Antidepressants, wanting to disappear	Happy, grounded, myself
Periods	Heavy, unpredictable, exhausting	Light and regular
Good days per month	Approximately seven	The whole month, minus 1-2 days on occasional months

Contraception Killed My Mood

What has been most significant has been the mood shift. The pill years were the worst of it — I genuinely did not know who I was emotionally. When I came off the pill, my mood was so much better. I got off antidepressants and was actually happy. I still struggled with my mental framing, with how I thought about things.

After years of my hormones controlling my brain, it was now time for my mind to take the wheel and direct the chemicals it produced.

I look out at life now, and other than maybe one day a month where I still experience strong PMDD symptoms tied to the natural hormonal shifts in my body, life is genuinely good.

Granted, my life is good. But it is incredible how these things go hand in hand. Your internal state dictates your external state, and as one shifts, often so does the other. They move in unison.

Coming off the pill really showed me how much it had ruled my emotions. But I was still on the Mirena, because I had been taking both at the same time due to the severity of my endometriosis. I had been pumping my body full of artificial hormones both locally and systemically.

Now I am just me.

We underestimate the power of hormones, yet we change them like they are nothing. Too much testosterone in a man can make him aggressive. The oxytocin released after birth literally rewires your brain to erase the memory of physical pain (births don’t need to be painful, but that is a different story). We are at the whim of our hormones, we really are. And yet we think we can just change them chemically and all will be fine.

How Hormones and Endometriosis Are More Connected Than We Think

The relationship between hormones and endometriosis is not simple, and yet we treat it like it is. Coming off the pill exposed just how deeply artificial hormones had been shaping not just my cycle but my entire personality, my energy, my joy.

When you are changing your hormones chemically and consistently from the age of 15, it is almost impossible to know who you actually are underneath them. I didn’t know. I genuinely did not know that the vision inside myself of this great human who was trapped inside this failing body, was who I was the whole time. The body trap was as much made by synthetic hormones as it was endometriosis.

Coming Off Contraception Gave Me My Feminine Power Back

So much of who we are is chemical, hormonal. Change your hormones, change your life.

When I came off contraception, I finally felt empowered. Everything that I was, was just me. I had radical and full acceptance that every action I took, every behaviour I exhibited, every single part of who I was, it was all on me.

Yes, my hormones were still in action, and even now I am powerless to them sometimes. But that responsibility, that shift in consciousness, was everything. There were no excuses anymore. I was prepared for the worst emotions and mood instabilities, but I was not going to let it win.

Well, it didn’t even put up a fight.

I was just me. All the things I loved about myself I could feel again. Everything I was, was just more.

That meant I had to make huge internal shifts to really become who I knew I was under it all. But I finally could make those shifts.

I started new routines. I began to honour who I was. I was honest about my needs and how I needed to work them into my life. I respected my body rather than viewing it as the enemy.

And life changed. Everything changed.

Women are creators. By nature we create life, and that is an amazing thing to be capable of, even if you don’t want children. You still have that magic inside you. We turn houses into homes. We make what was ugly beautiful, what was broken fixed, what was sad, nurtured. We create. More than an artist, more than a painter or poet. We by nature create.

Once I had all these artificial hormones out of my body, once I was just me again, I felt I could tap into this power. It was like the contraception had been making me more male. More structured, regimented, routine.

Now my flow was a cycle. I was a cyclical being with ups and downs, not a 24-hour emotional machine of productivity. I was a monthly moving, growing, evolving human. I was a woman. And by being a woman, I could be truly magic again. I could create the life I wanted to live.

Happiest I Have Ever Been

Now, I am the happiest I have ever been. I have control over who I am. I know that not everyone is as fortunate as I am. Endometriosis is a complex disease and many have tried every solution with no relief. I can only speak from my own experience, and from that experience, coming off the pill and the Mirena entirely was the best thing I have ever done for my endometriosis symptoms and my mental health.

I am more of who I am now. Less pain, minimal symptoms, and I even have light, regular periods. I feel in control of my own future. My creative force is mine. This life is mine to build.

And although it has been a year and I am still not pregnant, I am not worried. I am going to be an exceptional mum, even if I do have to wear earphones when the baby screams. Baby will come when it is ready, and I trust it will be at exactly the right time for us both.

Have you ever felt that contraception made your endometriosis worse? If this resonated, please share it with someone who needs to read it.